Still seething

I was still angry and frustrated after work and the rest of the night.  And of course those feelings turned into anxiety, about money in particular.  Even knowing that we fine with it right, despite the massive moving expenses, I still feel so insecure and its all thanks to the lack of response over the raise.  It barely 9AM and I just pop a valium to quite the jittery feeling in my stomach.  Actually it feels like my entire torso... not butterflies, but a frightened bird trying to bash out of the cage that is my upper body.  Actually, let's make that birds, a few finches, that allows me to feel funny in different place at the same time.
It's also affecting my work, not in sense that I'm blogging instead of working, but that I'm not pursuing larger issues with the office's IT needs.  There want to switch to a new software package--fine, but it needs to be researched, someone has to be able to troubleshoot, someone had to install it, maintain it on a network, whatever, whatever, whatever.  But I've got no real incentive, other than boredom, to pursue this.  If I'm not going to get credit for all that work, by a title change and/or raise, then why should I do it?