I would call my job soul-crushing, but...

I don't believe in the soul.  I do believe in the mind, so I will say this job is mind-numbing.  It's very, very, very slow around here during the summer.  But at least it's air-conditioned and has super speedy internet.  So I will consider this my summer vacation and entertain you with a list of things I've done on summer vacation;

* Spaced-out
*Day Dreamed
*Discovered the world of wallpaper(as decorative paper that goes on walls, not desktop backgrounds) , and found the inexpensive corner of it which I can inhabit.  I have a wish list, but I haven't purchased anything.
*I go to insurance-covered therapy once a week in Beverly Hills.  On the bus.  But it's kinda like going to a fancy spa, right?  A brain spa. No? *sigh*
*Spent hours of my work day reading on-line comics.
*I didn't go to any movies this summer, but I did read the spoilers for every mainstream horror movie that came out.
* I got hit on by a variety of homeless men.
*Our car was broken into- so M and I got to travel to LA's TJ to replace the window.  Very exotic.  The place we ate breakfast at even had a parrot that can say, "viejo gordo (fat old man)".
*I've gone out drinking with some very hard drinkers, but I haven't thrown up.
*Slept with my eyes open, while typing nonsense at work so I look productive. 
*Obsessively checked my email, myspace, and facebook.

I know it's an impressive list, but one shouldn't be jealous.

Science quiz

I was listing to the radio and overheard that the Pew Research Center  has released the results of their science poll.  The report was basically pointing the wide discrepancies between the scientist and the lay person in their knowledge and point the usual hilarious/shameful lack of basic, basic science knowledge.

I wanted to wanted to see the question, so I went over to the Pew site and took the science quiz.  I had thought that there would be some easy ones in there, but that they would throw in some metric system question that would give me the predictably low non-scientist American score.  Not so!  All the questions were easy.  Which I find alarming.  Anyway, take the quiz here .

So proud of so little.

Got my promotion!

I'm now a network administrator and I'm drunk on power!  Actually, I'm buzzed on cold pills, but close enough.  My first project as network admin?  Fix one the office wireless networks, one that the original IT guy, the one with lots of experience and qualifications advised my bosses to get rid of because it was too expensive, too complicated and an all around piece of over priced crap.  About a year and half ago we got this dire warning, but someone in the office had insisted on buying a $500 access point that's incredibly unreliable.
Anyway the point is it's my job to fix it.  In theory this'll be a piece a cake, in practice I hope my phenomenal luck will get me through this.  I'm waiting for the router to come in, so I'm "pre trouble shooting"... what fun.  I can't wait to see what happens with this.

What I did at work today

Hooray for new fonts!

Work

So I'm now the unofficial network admin around here.  I'm trying to get this one very stubborn computer and printer to work together, but every time I try to use the trouble shooter (for the printer and network) it tells me that it can't find anything wrong and to consult the network admin.  It feels like that scene out Catch-22,
Dobbs: [Over the radio] Help him! Help him!
Yossarian: Help who?
Dobbs: Help the bombardier!
Yossarian: I'm the bombardier, I'm all right.
Dobbs: Then help HIM, help HIM! 

This extra funny to me, because my dad used tell me that at his old job, when someone was having trouble with their project, program or whatever they were in charge of, they would always say this quote.  Or "open the pod bay doors, HAL."  

My new desktop

Trust me,  this uploaded image pales in comparison to the vivid image that has been burned into my retinas.  I can see the negative version of it when I close my eyes.  And the text is actually rather smooth...

I love the "Keep Clam and Carry On" parody prints so much, and was so disappointed that I couldn't find a wallpaper for my desktop, I had to make this quickie version for work.   The text in the upper left conner is balanced out perfectly by all my folders.
It's a bit shoddy, yes, but I'll make a better one later today.

This will be a very long work week

Three days off for Xmas, plus the weekend, two days off New Year's, plus the weekend. For the past two weeks I've only spent 40 hours in the office, as opposed to the usual 80+. But now everything goes back to normal. Granted I have vacation and sick time, but it's just not the same. This week the only things I have to look forward to are leaving early for the doctor, my new computer stuff to come in, payday, and pill popping. It is indeed a very glamours life I lead. How I wish I had an office, or at least an actual cubical to call my own, because then I could actually read books during the long, long day.

Quotes of the Day

Work related depression has been slightly alleviated thanks to my pills, junk food, and How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying quotes such as these beauties featured below.

"How to Choose the Right Company: before applying for a job, make sure the company is a large one. This is essential. It should be at least large enough so that nobody quite knows exactly what the other fellow is doing."

"If you have education, intelligence, and ability, so much the better. But, remember that thousands have reached the top without any of these qualities."

"[T]his is the time for maintaining a cool head, and following the one simple rule: put the blame on somebody else."

Maybe I could start drinking Babycham instead...

I mean just look at this ad, isn't great?  And it's only a hard cider....

The only catch is that it seems like it might be a bit hard to find state side.  But I will track it down one way or another.  I will drink this pear cider, damn it.  If any one finds this in LA county please let me know.  Maybe I should put wheat paste poster that read "missing, one deer, responds to the name Babycham."  Would that get people attention or would it just get me in trouble?  

I'm so outta of it right now

I thought that Xanax and Valium were supposed to be addictive, where one has to keep taking more and more to get the same effect.  I, however, seem to be going through the opposite effect.  I I get totally knocked out on when I take it, so much so, that I actually will fall asleep in the car (with M driving of course) which I've never been able to do in my entire life.   It's not calming me down anymore, it's knocking me the fuck out.  

Like today for example, I had my morning round of pills, and now I'm fantasying about using my sick time so I can go take a nap.   No, I'm not fantasying, I'm seriously considering it. 

How to be a Wallflower at Any Club

that's what's so nice about blogging, learning something new every week. This portion is supposed to be part of a series, "How to be a Wallflower at Any Club". Anyway, we went to Das Bunker on Friday. They have lots of places to sit and make very strong drinks.

Anyway we knew it was a goth-industrial club, so we all wore black, which also allowed us to blend into the seating. I wouldn't call that music industrial, more electro, drakwave, techno rave-y, but what do I know? I know how to be an annoying pain in the ass, that's what I know.



People watching was great. Everyone wore those platform buckle boots (think JTHM), which made us all feel very short, despite my wearing 4 inch heels. We used to go to La Plaza Salon (also to people watch), where there were mainly very recent immigrants from Central America, so I'm used to being the tallest at 5'6.

Taking that trip at work...

Valium at work is wonderful. It's like a three martini lunch, but without the nausea. I feel calm, charming, cozy. Very nice. I think I'll call it the "Secretary Sedative" or the "Administrative Assistant's Aid." It's very much like night time cold med.s, but without the feeling that you could just pass out at any moment. I'm considering dissolving the pill in the coffee to mellow my coworkers, or take the pills, grind them up and put into the vents... *

* I'm not really considering any of this, those pills is mines.