The further confession of a beverage addict

So my foray into sobriety has not been as smooth a transition as I thought it would be.  I have been drinking, but a lot less.  I almost cut out hard liquor and now I have a glass of wine instead of a whole bottle.  And I don't buy wine every time I go to the store, so I've gone from buying booze on an almost daily basis to once a week.  So I'm still pleased with my self.  But I'm just addicted to fluids, no alcohol, then I have diet soda, no soda, then give me some juice, no juice, then I make some coffee.  If I'm desperate I'll drink water.  The other day we only had orange juice in the house and I drank the whole thing.
It's like I always want to be tasting something.  I would eat more snacks, but as a compulsive hand washer I can't do any other chores while eating.

Climbin' that pole to success

As expected this story begins in a bar. A bar with a pole. Lousy music + can't drink more than one martini = let's pole dance! Actually we thought we try to climb up the pole, think the reverse of firemen sliding down the pole. It's harder than it looks. I do not have the upper body strength to hoist myself up a pole, and despite having long, finger-like toes, I was unable to utilize them due the huge heels I had decided to wear that night.
Hmm, what else is new... we were in the unnamed club for X's birthday. In San Diego. M and I have finally forced our friends to live through the horror that lesbian night life in San Diego. We got these really cute shoe's for X, see image below,





















Oh, and instead of getting hung over this weekend I got a cold.

How I fell off the wagon

and on to my face.
Well, not really.  I had one beer and one martini whilst hanging out with friends.  We even got to go this little bar in Long Beach that I had always wanted to go when I lived there.  It wasn't as nifty as it looked on the outside and the drinks were lousy, which was actually good for me since it kept me from overindulging on cheap drinks.  But we had fun.  
Anyway, I had two drinks, or one and a half because I split the beer with M.  Which is still an improvement over my bottle a day consumption, since that's all I had were the one and half beverages.  The worst part about drinking so much less is that I feel so much better.  Physically and mentally.  It's so strange...

Free time

So I've got oodles of free time, now that I'm not drinking, so what habit should replace it?  Chain smoking?  Not a recession friendly hobby.  Knitting?  It does keep your hands busy, and it can be done while watching cartoons, but it does involve counting, so that's out.  Maniacally cleaning the studio?  It took me forever to break M's habit of obsessively cleaning our home, which I'm beginning to regret, but I shouldn't start what I convinced another to stop... what's a recession friendly, non sanity-sucking hobby? I know,  I'll become a housewife!  No, not the type that does anything useful, but the type that wears a glamours housecoat and those high heel slippers with the little fuzzy tufts on 'em.  Yes, this is indeed a brilliant idea.  Oh, I'll keep my day job, but the minute I walk through the security door, up the five flights of stairs, and through our front (and only) door I will transform  into my housewife persona.   All I need to complete the outfit is a bottle of valium(check!) and an ice cold martini... damn.

Now I know why I got so messed up!

Because I was PMSing! Yes, it is a verb.  I always, always get sick if drink right before I get my period.  I didn't get sick because I'm a lightweight (4 martinis and a bottle of wine), but because my period makes extremely sickly.  And it explains the back pain.  But I'm still calling it quits,  so my offer for free hooch is still good.

Liquor give away!

Who wants some?!  Since I've managed to fuck up my back and neck thanks to post-bender vomiting, I've come to the conclusion that I am officially too old for this.  At this point in my life I seem to no longer have my ability to instantly recover from binge drinking.  So I'm going cold turkey on this one.  No vodka, no gin, no whiskey, no beer, no wine.  I've got the booze in a bag, ready to go the home of a needy alcoholic. I dumped out all the cheap stuff, so only the cream of the crop is left...



I will make an exception should anyone be so kind as give me a bottle of Babycham.

Valentine's Underwear

 

So as you should know last month women in India were attacked by a group of men for being in a bar.  The men consider it their moral duty to protect from "un-Indian" and "loose" behaviors.  To protest this attack Indian women will sending pink underwear to leader of the Sri Ram Sena. The protest group named them selves the Consortium of Pub-Going, Loose and Forward Women .
I love the poster design.

This might become my February banner

BTW all these things I'm posting today are for sell on Ebay...

This is how I want to feel

Party for a cause

This was concept I was unfamiliar with until college.  Various people, sometimes for community event, sometimes for more personal reasons, would throw fund raiser parties.  Not in the house party sense, because everyone feels that their doing something to better humanity, but the set up is similar, either a fee at the door or cash bar, or sometimes both.  Anyway, my friends and I have come with various reasons to throw a fund raising party, like for Botox.  I even designed a flyer, but nothing ever came from that because we couldn't agree on a location.
I want to have iPhone party for M, I just need like 25 people who can pay $10 each ( I make very good drinks, so this is really bargain)  et voila!  We just need a space for this.
I think a party for a frivolous cause set the right kind of ambience, the feeling of excess and decadence that exudes(or should I use "oozes") from the very idea...

New Year's resolutions during a recession

Obviously my main resolution is to save money.  Which means I'll be brown bagging it for the rest of the year, which means no more fried cheese for lunch, which means I'll be eating health food because vegetables and fruit are cheap.  So its kinda of like I'd be taking care of two resolutions at once; save and eat better.  I also want to cut back on my drinking, I know that must come as a shock to you my dear readers, but I know the combo of drinks and pills are not good for my body.  This will also allow me to save a lot by not spending so much at clubs.  I would say this will save money at Trader Joe's, by not getting two buck Chuck every time I go there, but I like the fizzy drinks from there (and the Izzies from Target) which cost as much as wine.  If not more.
Taking a moment to talk about my compulsive drinking, I was home alone during the day on the 31st and I drank half a carton of orange juice and a bottle of wine, because that was all we had.  Then I had like 5 beers at a NYE party.  And a rum and coke. And half a martini.  And diet coke.  And a milk shake.   We started our evening at In n' Out, then a house party, then a club, then conked out at X's.  Other than having to use the really nasty bathroom at the goth club (I had no idea that it took so much strength to ... um... hover over a toilet, but when there are no seat covers, what's a girl to do?) there were no ill side effects.  Not even a trace of a hangover.  It appears that I drink and it affects M, because she did wake up with a headache.
Back to the topic of resolutions; everything will be fine if we can just keep our jobs for the rest of the year. So far it seems that we're in no danger, but if we hit that 10% unemployment rate, or an economic depression as it is called, it will be time for all our friends to move in to our studio (we've got rent control!)

New Year's Resolutions

Happy New Year!  My quest for Babycham continues...

And yes, it is back in stock at BevMo online, I just don't want to order it, shipping's too high.

2 Valium + 1 and 1/2 martinis =

Total loss of balance, apparently. And lots of vomiting. Now I understand what they mean about the pills intensifying the effects of alcohol. Usually when I'm that kind of drunk, there's a feeling of desperate urgency and pleading with the booze gods that I'll just make it through the night. Not this time. I didn't care, I knew I would be fine. Despite the inability to walk.

The good news is that you don't care that you're throwing up, you're not upset about it. It doesn't even taste bad, not that it taste great, but you're kind of like "whatever body, why do you always try to be so dramatic?"
The other upside is that there's no accompanying hangover, because you can't imbibe that much before you get to the point of no return. And I think I threw up all the booze.

BTW, all this took place at the fun Xmas party. And the real loss of balance didn't occur until I got home.

Confession of a compulsive drinker

I drink compulsively.  Doesn't matter what it is, water, booze, tea, coffee, juice, soda, energy drinks, if it's around I will drink and then I will have another, and another, and another...  If I only have access to coffee, I'll 3-4 cups, regardless of how bad it taste.  Water?  Why I'm right next to water cooler, so as soon as the disposable cup gets halfway empty, it's time to freshen it up.  Energy drinks?  Despite no longer having need to stay up all night, in fact at this point in my life it's to my disadvantage, but I'll still drink 'em till I'm all jittery anyway.
This compulsion is only a problem because of alcohol, since I will drink that compulsively as well.  The good news is that tolerance is really high, but I'm sure ingesting so much poison is not good for my body.  One martini, try 4-6, all very strong, or a whole bottle of red wine, or 4 mojitos (which are about 1/2 rum when I make 'em and I always use tall glasses).  Thanks to my high tolerance, I'm a very productive drunk, household projects, crafts, elaborately organized underwear drawers  At first M and I both thought that my productive benders were just away to calm myself down, which they are of course, but not to the extent we thought.  It wasn't until I realized I drink this way all the time, albeit less harmful liquids.  So I've toned down the hard drinking a bit, no more weekday martinis and mojitos, only two glasses of wine instead of the whole bottle, because of M's concern for my health and because I'm taking 5-6 pills everyday, two of which are sedatives, so I shouldn't really be mixing all this stuff... anyway, this has really increased my soda and juice consumption.

Babycham Studies

I want it, I want it, I want it!

Here's an ad from the 80s, obviously;